[Erica vagans]

Normal people would settle for a card and a cake by SuperiorDimwit
archiveofourown.org/works/9170470
Кроссовер Supernatural и Ao no Exorcist | Blue Exorcist, точнее даже авторского макси по экзорцисту. Юмор, диалоги, Мефисто ♥ и хэппиэндовая - в рамках канонов - концовка, в общем это стоит перечитать холодными зимними вечерами.

I Kick Ass For The Lord

"What I'd like to know", Dean said loud enough to drown out anything Shirou might have responded, "is how an exorcist from the 70's, in another reality, knows that we even exist. Since you came here on special request and everything. How does that even work, unless Chuck's books somehow time travelled and… reality travelled."

"Timelines", Crowley said before Shirou had even a chance to open his mouth. "There's more timelines in the universe than either of us can ever hope to imagine. All different but containing more or less the same elements – like your average blockbuster movie. There's sure to be a Sam and Dean Winchester, in some form, in most of them."

"M-mh, what Samael said – sorta. With more words. Sam and Dean Winchester are characters in a series that runs in the Malak, a bi-monthly magazine the exorcist Order issues. It's what everybody talks about when they're fed up with writing mission reports. I think there's even a few illustrated comics with side stories, but they're released in the U.S. so I haven't been able to read them."

"Wait. Just wait." Dean left one hand on the wheel and used the other to halt any speech in the car while he struggled to put words on his new epiphany. "If we're some bi-monthly series in another dimension, does that mean books in our world could be real stories of real people in other dimensions?"

"Uh… I suppose?"

"Shit", Dean said profoundly to the windscreen. "I can never read Wolverine again. Or Deadpool. Or– Hey, what's the name? Our series in that newspaper, what's it called?"

"Supernatural."

"Aw come on! Even in an alternate reality? Why don't they ever come up with something cool, like Hellbeast Hunters? Or Fairy Fighters?"

"Excellent name", Crowley pitched in. "Doesn't make you think of a junior figure skating team at all."

"Luggage doesn't talk, alright?" Then a hearty chuckle broke through and lit up his whole face. "Wait wait, I know: Sanctified with Dynamite. That's the title of our series." Dean drummed his fingers on the wheel to some unheard rhythm, looking pleased with himself as he hummed a melody that sounded vaguely like "dy, dy, dynamite – hallelujah".

"Not Boobs, Bullets & Booze?"

"That's the director's cut, not the version they run in that exorcist magazine", he said with a knowing grin. "Alright but your series? If there were books about you, what would they be called?"

"Uuhhhh… Till the Next Goodbye, maybe."

"Oh man I'm glad you have the Stones in your reality, the 70's wouldn't have existed without– Hey. I know exactly what your series would be called." Dean turned his head and beamed at him with a childish delight that made Shirou want to burn the moment into his retina permanently. "I Kick Ass For The Lord."

"Uhh… I guess?"

The confused-but-agreeing look was not what Dean had expected. His beaming dimmed. Then he frowned: then he tossed an eye at Crowley.

"Dude what year did Braindead come out?"

"You're his brother, I expected you would know."

"You just got your eleventh dick, buddy." He returned his eyes to the road. "For the record I was hilarious right now. There's a movie called Braindead: whenever it comes to your reality you'll understand."

"Unless it's about something else entirely in my reality", he mused. "Like a junior figure skating team."

@темы: фики, rereadable